So I have a new computer now. Its a mac. I love it. I definitely have the growing pains of switching from a PC to the awesomeness.  I got the 2.0 ghz new mac. I dont even know if ghz is right... all i care about is i love it and it works for me. His name is Macster. or Lappy. or Macsterlappy. 

I am moving right on through Leadership in Nursing school.  I have 3 shifts left in the ED. One of those I will do Friday, and the last two I will do next week.  I will be done on Halloween. I turned in my Senior Project Proposal today. It was 32 pages long. Longest paper I have ever written. Can I just tell you that I am so glad that is over? Now all I have to do is implement it. Oh and hope that I passed. 

Speaking of the ED... I have been struggling with what to apply for in my residency because I am not so sure the ED is the best fit for me. Not at that hospital. So I have been putting off this application like nobody's business; praying like crazy that God would give me some direction.  And of course, He did.  I met with my nursing school mentor and prayed about it and talked to my professor and several other people and I have decided to apply for the Cardiovascular residency as my first choice.  I will still apply for the ED because I am good at it, and if I have to struggle through certain things, I will. BUT I am just thankful that God didn't just give me a small nudge in a particular direction, but he actually gave me excitement too. I think I would be really happy in Cardiovascular care. I love the heart. I get it. I could tell you how it works in my sleep. 

SO my residency application is as follows: Cardiovascular, Emergency Service, Labor & Delivery.

In other news....

Socky stopped walking today.  I knew in my head that he is super super old, but i have this great tendency to overlook things i don't want to think about. The end of his life is one of those things.  

Right now I have placed myself so that I can keep my eye on him and make sure he is still breathing.  I'll spare all the nasty details of his deterioration over the past few days. Its been so hard to watch. We want him to die peacefully at home. And he really doesn't seem to be in pain, but rather lethargic. Daddy and I have started carrying him around in a towel like a hammock.  He looks so old and sickly. Not that he has been super chipper these last few years, but he is showing every day of his 17 and 2/3 years.  His birthday is February 3rd, 1992.  I dont think I have known any person outside my family for that long. In fact, I know I haven't. 

I watched him come into this world. In my closet when I was 6 years old. I don't want to see him leave it.

Ugh it just sucks.